About the Poem

A rather unpleasant poem about a man who ate his relatives, his neighbours (plus their dog) and assorted others before himself coming to a sticky end. Not, perhaps, a very moral cautionary verse.

Category

Cautionary Verse

Style

Nonsense Poem

Length

18 lines

Key Stage

KS2, KS3

Author

Max Scratchmann

The Hunger

Geoffrey-Geoffrey Dinglyby-Smythe,
Also known as the glutton of Hythe,
Ate his mother with cheese and chives,
And a dash of honey from her hives.

Polished her off with his morning tea,
Before eating his Dad at ten-past three,
His Aunty Flo he swallowed whole,
After a helping of Dover sole.

But his tummy still rumbled and he called for more,
And he ate the spaniel from next door,
The neighbours yelled so he ate them up,
Then washed them down with some barley cup,

And a nice Chianti and a bottle of pop,
Before eating the woman from the corner shop,
Will I never be full? he sadly cried,
As he choked on a rib and promptly died.
And they buried him out on the deep blue sea,
As he’d eaten the priest for last night’s tea.

Copyright © Max Scratchmann. All Rights Reserved

firstpreviousbad children and cautionary versenextlast
Funny Poems and Nonsense Verse for Kids
Funny Poems and Nonsense Verse for Kids
Copyright © Nonsense Poems for Kids / Patrick Winstanley 2002-2015 All Rights Reserved.
Individual poems are copyright Max Scratchmann and used with permission